I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals,
it's because I hate vegetables!
- Woody Allen
With all this crap they put in meat, like hormones for fast growing, antibiotics, etc... we will all go down, there’s only the vegetarians that will survive – so let me give you a good piece of advice: if you want to eat some healthy meat, eat a vegetarian!
-JeanLuc LeMoine, French humorist
Why do people kill animals?
Fur convenience steak.
What do you call a vegetarian who goes back to eating meat?
-Someone who lost their veg-inity!
Mrs. Smith had cooked a halfway decent meal one night, and
the old Smith had been goin' at it with gusto. He was about halfway finished his meal when he took a good long look at the potato. He looked over at Mrs. Smith and said, "This potato is bad." Mrs. Smith picked it up, smacked it, and put it back on his plate... then said, "If that potato causes any more trouble, you just let me know."
What did the lettuce say to the celery?
-Are you stalking me?
Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad, dressing
